A Murder of Innocence

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Bill H “A Murder of Innocence” is a cinematic masterpiece - if your idea of a masterpiece is watching paint dry while simultaneously stubbing your toe repeatedly. This faith-based crime drama is so mind-numbingly dull that it could be prescribed as a cure for insomnia. The plot, if you can call it that, revolves around a double homicide that shakes a small town to its core. Spoiler alert: the only thing being murdered here is the audience’s patience. The local pastor and his wife struggle to cope with the aftermath, presumably because they’re as bored as we are. The acting is so wooden, I’m pretty sure the trees in the background were more emotive. The dialogue is about as natural as a plastic plant, with characters spouting religious platitudes that sound like they were ripped from a dollar store greeting card. The pacing is glacial, making you yearn for the sweet release of the end credits. I’m fairly certain I aged several years during the runtime. The film drags on for so long, I half expected to see the characters evolve into a new species by the end. The attempts at building suspense are about as effective as using a feather to cut down a redwood. The only mystery here is why anyone thought this script was worth filming. In a stunning display of cinematic ineptitude, the movie manages to make a double homicide boring. That’s like making a documentary about rollercoasters and having people fall asleep. If you’re looking for a film that combines the excitement of watching grass grow with the spiritual depth of a kiddie pool, then “A Murder of Innocence” is the movie for you. Otherwise, you’d be better off spending your time alphabetizing your spice rack or teaching your pet rock new tricks. In conclusion, “A Murder of Innocence” is a crime against cinema. The only innocence murdered here was that of the unsuspecting viewers who thought they were in for an engaging thriller. Save yourself the torment and watch paint dry instead - it’s more action-packed and has a better plot Rated 0.5/5 Stars •  Rated 0.5 out of 5 stars 01/20/25 Full Review Read all reviews

A Murder of Innocence

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