Lantern's Lane

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James B One of the worst movies I've ever seen. Not in the "so bad it's good" way, and not in the "you should watch it because it's funny how bad it is" way. Just in the way that I'm mystified that people paid money to produce this garbage that was nothing but a boring high school film from beginning to end. It's not comedy, it's not horror, it's barely even a movie. Anyone who rated this above a 3 was trying to artificially inflate their score, or is a complete idiot who's also entertained by jingling keys. Don't waste your time Rated 0.5/5 Stars •  Rated 0.5 out of 5 stars 03/06/24 Full Review Shane T It's horrible. I made an account just to review this movie. It's boring, nothing happens, the characters suck, the dialogue is horrendous, and I haven't even finished the movie yet. The wounds are barely wounds. The killer looks like it's just some normal person. I hate this movie. Don't watch it. Rated 0.5/5 Stars •  Rated 0.5 out of 5 stars 12/19/23 Full Review Audience Member Totally STUPID! These people do everything EXACTLY OPPOSITE of what anyone in their position would do, and against all common sense. One of them escapes and literally stays around the house the killer has her friends trapped in, playing hide and seek instead of running as far away from the place as she can and bringing back help. When her friend even tries to suggest she go for help, what does she do instead? Insist on sneaking back into the house to be trapped inside with her friends instead! These are brainless wonders for people if I’ve ever seen. Rated 1/5 Stars •  Rated 1 out of 5 stars 11/29/23 Full Review Stephen A A Slasher Film Lost in the Shadows of Mediocrity. Attempting to be a slash-and-dice extravaganza, this film feels more like a lost trick-or-treater wandering into a poorly decorated haunted house. The script might as well have been scrounged from the bargain bin of horror clichés, lacking the spine-tingling, nerve-wracking elements fans crave. Gathering in a haunted lane should be hair-raising, but it's about as terrifying as a trip to the dentist. The film's direction is akin to a driver on autopilot, missing every opportunity to rev up the tension. Performances are as exciting as a deflated balloon, leaving characters as deep as a kiddie pool. Lantern's Lane is a flashlight in desperate need of fresh batteries—watch at your own risk if boredom beckons, but don't expect spine-tingling thrills. Rated 2/5 Stars •  Rated 2 out of 5 stars 11/22/23 Full Review Jeremy P It watches like a Hallmark channel movie. This movie hurt my brain. Will never recover brain cells. Rated 1/5 Stars •  Rated 1 out of 5 stars 10/04/23 Full Review Barry T My only question after watching this horrible movie is why didn't they just phone the police? At least it didn't cost anything to watch. Imagine spending $ to sit through this turkey Rated 0.5/5 Stars •  Rated 0.5 out of 5 stars 03/13/23 Full Review Read all reviews

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