Scorchy

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Audience Member This moves way too slowly to be good, but would do well as a parody piece, like a ladies' "Starsky and Hutch" (2004). It was also shot mostly in Seattle, WA, so if you can hold on to your boredom, this is a time capsule of the city before Amazon and Microsoft built it up. If you can't hold on to your boredom, you can do what my husband said as he left the room, "Fast forward to the action." So, I scrolled until I saw Lake Washington (?) and I yelled "CONNIE STEVENS IS SKINNY DIPPING!". There is some action in this, but it's probably best enjoyed as background music for some real hanky-panky...drive-in style. Rated 2/5 Stars •  Rated 2 out of 5 stars 02/17/23 Full Review Audience Member She's killed a man, been shot at, and made love twice already this evening…and the evening isn't over yet!" I mean, how am I not going to watch this movie after all that? Man, American-International kept putting out awesome movies late into the 1970's, with this Howard Avedis written, produced and directed caper (made back when he was still Hikmet Avedis). If you're looking for more Avedis goodness (Goovedis?), I'd recommend The Teacher, Dr. Minx, The Fifth Floor, They're Playing With Fire and the awesome Mortuary. Jackie Parker (Connie Stevens!) is a cop by day and a drug smuggler by night, when she isn't hooking up with Greg Evigan. She's after drug dealer Philip Bianco (Ceaser Danova) and has to deal with the awesome William Smith as Carl, one of the henchmen, who leads her on a chase through the streets of Seattle that involves a dune buggy, a vehicle which seems quite out of place in the City of Flowers. At some point in the 1980's when this was released on VHS, the original Igor Kantor-supervised soundtrack was replaced with a Miami Vice inspired score, which is completely out of this world great. Stevens had a clean image before this movie, so it must have been shocking to see her bed guys and suggest that her elder boss get some fellatio to improve his mood. It's like this movie has the dialogue of an adult film without any of the actual penetration! Actually, the only penetration is when Carl attacks Scorchy while she's scoring with a guy, entering her Lake City home to shoot the guy in the ass cheek with a harpoon as if this was an Emerald City version of A Bay of Blood. Man, I live in Pittsburgh and the movies that the world knows my hometown for all involve zombies, which is certainly an awesome thing, but if I were from Seattle, I would be quite honestly inordinately proud of having Scorchy made there. It's a near-perfect drive-in movie and ends James Bond style with a barrage of cops descending on the drug dealer's house and people being shotgun blasted left and right. I wish Avendis made twenty sequels to this movie. Rated 4/5 Stars •  Rated 4 out of 5 stars 02/06/23 Full Review Read all reviews

Scorchy

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