Audience Member
Satan Claus (1996) is a boring, tasteless, stupid, ridiculous, poorly made pile of trash that should never be discovered ever. The second it was finished, the makers should've buried it so far underground it would be nearly impossible to ever dig it up. The story goes like this: A killer dressed in a shitty Santa Claus costume with a Brooklyn accent goes around killing people in New York City. That's it. However, there is a plot twist which is beyond stupid which I'll not spoil because there might be someone who wants to watch this piece of crap. It looks to be lit by a single solar light, or for indoor scenes, a bug zapper. My God, I never thought that you could sink lower than garbage like "Don't Go In The Woods Alone" or "The Prey" or "Sledgehammer" but this one managed to be worse than all of those combined! I'd rather be stabbed in the eyes with a giant ice pick. Much more entertaining than this rubbish! I might as well go as far as to say that this is probably the worst slasher film of the 1990s. It deserves to never be discovered, never be experienced, never seen. It deserves to be lost forever. Nobody would lose any sleep if it did. I can handle bad films like "Camp Blood" and "Blood Lake" and "Carnage Road" but this one is too horrible to handle. 0/10. I'm not even gonna try and find a redeeming factor about this because.........THERE ARE NONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rated 0.5/5 Stars •
Rated 0.5 out of 5 stars
01/17/23
Full Review
Audience Member
Not very good, but it can be a bit fun in some scenes. It's pretty low budget, and the acting isn't great, but the killer is pretty fun. The plot is decent, but the ending just makes things confusing.
Rated 2.5/5 Stars •
Rated 2.5 out of 5 stars
02/02/23
Full Review
Audience Member
HORRIBLE. I'm pretty sure the entire movie was lit by a single flashlight with a blue filter. I fell asleep at the very end and this movie is about 60 minutes long, I wasn't even tired. Some of the worst acting I've ever seen too, not even in a fun way!
Rated 1/5 Stars •
Rated 1 out of 5 stars
02/12/23
Full Review
Audience Member
25 DAYS OF HELLIDAY HORROR
#20: SATAN CLAUS (1996)
'Satan Claus' is a low-budget, bloody horror gem. It was also extremely hard to find. It should be noted that this movie was not as low-budget as 'Psycho Santa', it was about 1 or 2 notches up from that in camera picture quality and overall presentation and editing.
It is about a psychotic, serial killer dressed as Santa Claus that is killing innocent people during Christmas Eve in New York. The news dubs the killer "Satan Claus". The funny thing about it is that somebody is actually using satanic, black magic to control Satan Claus, so he actually lives up to the name. Satan Claus' kills are all very quick and evil. Each victim he kills, he cuts off a different body part to adorn his evil christmas tree with! His first victim is the police captains wife. He uses her head as the very top most 'ornament' or christmas star for his satanic x-mas tree! Absolutely, bloody epic!
Overall: The lighting for the movie itself was very, very dark. Maybe it was just the copy itself, but it was difficult to make out anything especially scenes at night time. This really didn't detour away from the awesome murders and grizzly, gruesome plotline. The movie even has a strange, "holy shit" twist at the end that is quite unexpected. It is a true 'Killer Santa' flick that really delivers in the psychoticness and holiday evil. Most of the acting was pretty pitiful, but dont forget that 'Satan Claus' is totally a shitty B-movie. The way Satan Claus just roams around in his van and sings the wrong lyrics to 'jingle bells' is just realistically creepy for some reason. It makes you wonder if there are real psycho's like that! He really doesn't hesitate with his victims either, he just gets in there and gets the job done, no dilly-dallying! Yep, Satan Claus is definitely a sick bastard, and proves worthy of being #20 on the '25 Days of Helliday Horror' list. Tell 'em Bruce Willis!
Bruce Willis: "There's not much more to tell than that. Water's wet, the sky is blue and ol' Satan Clause, Jimmy, he's out there and he's just getting stronger."
(Bruce Willis as Joe Hallenbeck in 'The Last Boyscout')
Rated 3/5 Stars •
Rated 3 out of 5 stars
01/12/23
Full Review
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