Rob C
OK, so this is another one of my "Trifecta of Terror" movies from when I was a kid growing up in the early 1970s (the other 2 being "The Killer Shrews" and "The Brain From Planet Arous")... meaning, that, to my 9 year old self, these 3 movies legitimately scared the bejeezus out of me. And not just me; I have 3 younger sisters and "Terror from Y5K" scared them, too. How scared? Well, how about the 4 of us, after watching this down on the old Black & White TV in my parents basement... running up the stairs, screaming, literally clawing at each other - so that we wouldn't be the last one up the stairs. Because the last person, well, the "Chicken Lady" was gonna get ya!
("Chicken Lady" was the name we assigned to the mutated villian of this movie. Why? Because, although she could speak perfect English - and apparently, Greek as well - for some insane reason whenever she killed someone in the movie she would instead screech in a tone that sounded like a berzerk chicken! BTW, in the actual movie cast this creature was known simply as "Future Woman"...)
Anyway, seeing this movie again as an adult brought a mix of slightly creepy nostolgic "terror" tempered with a heavy dose of "Wow - I never realized this movie was SO bad!"... I mean, first off, the movie is only 64 minutes long - and the "Terror" doesn't even start until about 40 minutes in. Oh, and the "Terror" is quite sparse, even after that. We know that this (allegedly) scary thing came out of this "time machine" that looks like an oversided hot water heater with a window (LOL)... and we are pretty sure it's a woman. And we're KINDA sure that it's a monster... but, you never really get a good look. The first time you see the Chicken Lady's mutated face is when she kills this creepy old farmhand (or 'swamphand', since the locale is a swampy island somewhere around Florida)... it starts with her bent over something in the forest, kind of in the shadows (there is alot of that in this flick, shadows and overall dark lighting - even in the daylight scenes) and when the swamphand approaches her, there's some kind of "sparkly" special effect that I think was supposed to suggest hypnosis (?)...but when she turns around and takes her Chicken Lady hands and radioactively burns the dude to death - they show her full face for literally like 1/4 of a second (kudos to the editing guy for what may be the fasted jump cut edit in motion picture history)... Now, as a kid, I got that super-brief glimpse and my imagination thought "They cut away so fast because her face is just too scary!"... grown up me realizes the truth was "they cut away so fast because her face is just so cheesy looking and fake!"
Anyway, this movie is noteworthy for film buffs for being the film debut of actress Salome Jens (The "Changeling" from one of the Star Trek series)... Yep, she was the Chicken Lady way before she was the Changeling. And you actually get to see what she really looked like sans Chicken Lady garb, because she also played the "Nurse" that the Chicken lady killed and stole her face (really)... and Salome was, in fact, quite an attractive women after all. She really fills out the black unitard that the Chicken lady apparently needs to time travel in.
Anyway, the climax of this movie is that the scientists find out that the Nurse is actually the Chicken Lady. One of the female scientists starts a catfight with CL and pulls off her fake face (really) and then FINALLY you get a decent look at her "mutatedness"... and this is around minute 62 of the movie.
You do get an extended view of the disfigurement during the literal last minute of the movie, as poor Salome lays there, her fake mutated dead mug staring out blankly - whilst the male scientist protaganist ponders mankind's future, monologue - style...
Oh, and they literally waste a good 4 or 5 minutes of screen time (around minute 55 or so) having the protagonists in the film go see a movie (a different American International Pictures horror film, in fact)... I'm dead serious. In the middle of having a wildy radioactive mutated killer from the year 5200 A.D. running amok on your island, your heroes take a boat to the mainland for dinner and a movie (!) That's how lame the overall plot for this film is.
But I still highly recommend it because it truly is "so bad that it is good..."
MST3K spoofed this (you can find it online) or you can order a copy of the DVD (honestly, the MST3K print is the cleanest I have seen of this movie, and shows better than my DVD copy I bought off Amazon).
P.S. - definitely another "60s / 70s kid" thing; I played this for my grandkids once, expecting at least a little fright; and even the 5 year old laughed at it. "Terror', indeed...
Rated 5/5 Stars •
Rated 5 out of 5 stars
05/14/23
Full Review
philip h
Yep we got another crappy poster contender right here, oh boy this a bad one. Its totally misleading, shows things you never actually see and it makes no real sense. Are we watching a movie about a flying witch of some kind? From the future or perhaps? Is this a children's movie? The title is also way more exciting than the actual film itself, a common issue.
Now I'm gonna be straight up with everyone here, it took me some time before I really knew what the feck was going on here. Honesty, I was lost and bored amidst quite a bit of slow paced dialog and...errr...more slow paced dialog in various locations. OK...I actually had to go back and rewatch half of the movie to get the gist of it, yes it was that dull and uninteresting.
Nuclear physicist Prof. Howard Erling (Frederic Downs) and his assistant Victor (John Stratton) manage to construct a machine that can break the time barrier. The machine looks like a steel tub with a port hole window. Now if you thought the duo might start jumping through time you'd be sorely mistaken, alas! No in fact they manage to receive a small object from the future. Obvious questions such as who sent the object and why don't come into this, just go with the flow here. Said object turns out to be highly radioactive too which causes more intrigue, but still no real action on their part. Anyway after a whole load of character driven bollocks that literally goes nowhere, we eventually find out that the professor has been trading objects with persons unknown in the future.
Eventually it also turns out that Victor has been secretly conducting experiments himself, on a higher power level, which has resulted in mutated creatures appearing in the tub. One such recent experiment has resulted in a human-like creature coming through also, of course that creature is now on the loose. This creature turns out to be a woman from the year 5200 (ta-da! and yes that is correct, not the year 5000 after all), but not just any woman, she is a mutant. Yes it turns out that the future of mankind is doomed to a nuclear holocaust filled with mutants that seemingly still have pretty good technology. Her mission is to bring Victor back to the future so he can help them...somehow. Will she succeed or will she...umm...not? Tension!
Right so as I've already mentioned, the main crux of this story focuses on this time machine thingy which transport objects. This is the what you assume will be the fun macguffin which will transport our hapless duo through time. But you know now it doesn't, in fact it does very little for the entire movie. The problem with this movie is nothing really happens for the whole damn run time, until right at the end. But even then what we get is pitiful even for 1958. Heck we don't even see any future Earth, not even a matte painting or model or anything, you might as well be watching a cheap stage play. The idea is fine, nothing original mind you but fine, but they just don't explore it. I understand there were probably many obvious limitations but if you can't do your movie justice then don't do it.
There is so much padding in this movie its painful, painful pointless padding that goes nowhere and is draaab! The plot takes forever to get going and its all exposition dialog. Scene after scene of the professor and Victor working, discussing things, then working some more. Eventually an archaeologist is brought in to verify the items of the future. To make things more exciting there's a completely needless car chase sequence for this character intro. This guy seems to start falling for the professors daughter (of course) who is actually the fiancee of Victor. This naturally causes a typical 1950's love triangle type scenario that doesn't actually go anywhere, but instead leads to us finding out about Victor's skulduggery with the secret experiments. Victor is also upset because he thinks the archaeologist will discredit their hard work so...cue the obligatory fight sequence. Oh and there's also some voyeurism by the local handyman too because why not?
The mutated woman of the future is bitterly disappointing. A simple bit of tacky putty makeup and false teeth, and a very bizarre catsuit of some kind covered in sparkles (mirrors?). This character literally looks like something that jigged to the boogie on [i]Soul Train[/i]. Although, strangely enough at first the character is actually quite eerie and intimidating. The first time she is shown we only see her arm reaching from within the time machine, at least I assume that was her. Then when she actually comes through to the present, we get quite a scary fast moving silhouette dashing towards the camera accompanied by a terrifying scream. Twas pretty spooky truth be told. Not entirely sure if this woman had some kind of super powers or not but she seemed pretty strong, nifty face cloning/removal technology too. Actually that one idea and scene was quite impressive considering, definitely ahead of its time there and I would imagine very scary for a 1950's audience. Although it has to be said, this mutated female of the future also has a damn good glittery nail polish hypnotising technique, don't leave home without your nails all done up.
Amazingly there isn't much stock footage in this movie, yes there is a bit at the beginning (can't escape it fully) along with some narration, but its generally stock free. Apart from everything I've mentioned there isn't really a lot to discuss, the movie is on the whole pretty bad. The movie title is wrong apparently, the plot is boring and just never gets going, there are no real special effects bar one tiny optical effect, and its features yet another apocalyptic future with mutants scenario. I was desperate for someone to go through the time machine and into the future, desperate! But alas!
Rated 0.5/5 Stars •
Rated 0.5 out of 5 stars
03/31/23
Full Review
Audience Member
Terror From the Year 5000 (AKA Cage of Doom, AKA The Girl From 5000 A.D.) is one of those movies that probably looked better on paper than what the final product ended up being. I do have to give them credit because they were actually trying to pull something off that they felt would be successful and important. Even the special effect of the shiny, radioactive or disco-like woman from the future (whatever the glow and shininess is supposed to be) is different, and I've never seen that in a movie before. The plot follows a couple of scientists as they stumble onto time travel, but one becomes obsessed an accidentally brings a woman from the future back who is trying to save human life from eventual deformity. It's not really all that complex, but it's trying I suppose. This is another one that the crew from Mystery Science Theater 3000 took for a ride. They made it a bit more entertaining, but the movie itself isn't really.
Rated 1/5 Stars •
Rated 1 out of 5 stars
01/26/23
Full Review
Audience Member
It's an interesting tale but the effects are rather awful and the film is slow and mind numbing. Not a lot of good scenes and the characters are boring.
Rated 2.5/5 Stars •
Rated 2.5 out of 5 stars
02/02/23
Full Review
Audience Member
I remember the scary 'chicken lady' from when I was a child. lol
Rated 2.5/5 Stars •
Rated 2.5 out of 5 stars
01/23/23
Full Review
Audience Member
Terrible from the year 1958. The MST3K were on top of their game here and they really seemed to come out on the attack against this awful movie.
Rated 0.5/5 Stars •
Rated 0.5 out of 5 stars
01/21/23
Full Review
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