Black Dahlia

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Audience Member Found this DVD for $0.75 on clearance at a discount store, so my expectations were quite low from the start. Using the name Black Dahlia is an obvious cash-grab as this production is a "Class C" effort shot on video. That said I give the filmmakers credit for trying, it is at least watchable with clear video & sound. The acting performances and all other production values are marginal at best, and the writing is atrocious. That Lionsgate agreed to distribute this one is a head-scratcher. After 45 minutes I had had enough bad torture porn and elected instead to sort through my junk mail. Nice try, but this one is a swing & a miss. UPDATE: I managed to finish it, it became very repetitive and increasingly ridiculous. Definitely demented. Into the trash where it belongs. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need a shower...a long one! Rated 1.5/5 Stars •  Rated 1.5 out of 5 stars 02/01/23 Full Review Audience Member This was so bad that I would not watch anymore than 30 minutes or so. It is actually the only movie that I can’t remember not watching till the end. I actually rented this movie because I had heard that the Black Dahlia, was an interesting mystery movie.I actually got my money refunded at the video rental store. Remember those? There are two movies with the name black dahlia. Don’t watch this one! Rated 0.5/5 Stars •  Rated 0.5 out of 5 stars 09/12/20 Full Review Audience Member This was the first and only movie that I have ever watched more than 30 minutes of and then turned it off. My ex-wife and I suffered through the 45 minutes and had to quit. Right at about 45 minutes is when you start to see that the whole movie revolves around characters A murder character X; next scene: character B find character X and conduct investigation; next scene: character C slowly makes way on solving the case briefly intertwining with characters A and B. REPEAT! This isn't even one of those, it's so bad it's funny movies. The whole time you are just sitting there, offended, wondering why you have spent the past x number of picoseconds (yes, you will feel each individual picosecond drudgingly tick by) with Lommell slowly and methodically torturing you in ways that would make the crucifixion and impalement seem pleasant. I never tell people to watch "this movie" or "that movie" because I seem to have a really standard for what a good movie is. I can USUALLY find a bright side that allows me to be oddly content in the loss of an hour and a half to three and a half hours of my life. But, on this one, there is no bright side. Save your time and pee on some power lines or dive headlong into a volcano. Whoever said they "liked" this movie, as apparently someone did, they are sick, sadistic, lying bastards who only want to share in your torment and despondency. If you asked me to name 1,000 other things I would rather do than watch this movie, all I would have to do is say 1,000 different verbs and I would succeed. To say that watching this was a waste of time would be like saying that smallpox is an above average case of acne. A waste would be something that neither harms nor benefits you. This gives thousands of razor blade cuts an inch deep by an inch long , then packing wounds with phenol. It is actively harmful to your brain cells. You experience tremendous headaches as you FEEL them dying. I hope I have got my point across. I know I only spent a dollar for the rental, but I feel like Ulli owes me pain and suffering. Seriously.... Rated 0.5/5 Stars •  Rated 0.5 out of 5 stars 02/22/23 Full Review Audience Member So absolutely terrible that I actually thought it was a porno for a moment. It was just THAT bad of acting and quality. Rated 0.5/5 Stars •  Rated 0.5 out of 5 stars 02/03/23 Full Review Audience Member This film is boring than anything. While it had some moments of unintentional hilarity, it is nothing more than a bad film that tries to coattail the Brian DePalma film (Which already wasn't that great to begin with). The acting is atrocious, the story is terrible, and there are plenty of stupid moments which may provide a few laughs, but not nearly enough to salvage this awful low-budget misfire. Rated 2/5 Stars •  Rated 2 out of 5 stars 02/26/23 Full Review Audience Member This was awful!!! Yes...it was a slasher of ridiculous gore. For an 80 minute movie, there was film looping (the same footage shown throughout the movie). This was not scary. This was not interesting. This was more like some high school kid's film project with the least talented losers of the school. Lommel tries to be avant garde in this and it just comes across as a really bad attempt at telling a story. Watching paint dry would much more entertaining. Rated 0.5/5 Stars •  Rated 0.5 out of 5 stars 02/10/23 Full Review Read all reviews

Black Dahlia

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